Good job, Stanley. Everyone thinks you are very powerful.
|emasculatr said: as a lesbian political lesbianism makes me sort of uncomfortable and i'm trying to reverse that discomfort into something Cool and Nice but i'm having a really hard time finding a source on why it isn't harmful to me (maybe because of the "it's the a choice" mentally which still feels a little strange) and sometimes i see you posting about it and i was wondering if you might be able to explain it to me a little?? i'm sorry for bothering you!!|
i mean for my part i am really not into dudes sexually and 100% not into them romantically. this is informed by other choices i made (transness is kind of that for me) but i think it’s fair to say that as much as anyone am i’m a ‘lesbian’ in the GLAAD sense.
i’m also a lesbian - what lesbian separatists / political lesbians would call a capital-l Lesbian - in the sense that i have decided as a political matter to deny myself to men, which is no trick for someone who doesn’t want a man as a lover or a partner but which is still a big issue for me as someone who has to live in a patriarchial society - it’s expected my friends will be men, it’s expected i will give men the time of day when even treating them equally to women wouldn’t involve giving them that. acting on my convictions (and it’s honestly less conscious than you’d think, this is a way of honoring shit i want to do and felt ashamed or afraid of before) is economically and socially and physically dangerous for me, and not always possible at all
also, i think there are definitely women out there who choose to focus on people other than men even though they’ve been sexually happy with men and i think they’re as gay as i am.
it’s also sorta complicated by being a trans lady because part of “i’m not for men” is also “i’m not for manhood”. when i’m into or like or want to be friends with a man a significant part of that is feeling a sense of fellow-feeling with them that i feel points to their manhood being a thing they can abandon. i don’t see men as a necessary complement to non-men, and when people come to my life as men i want them to stay in my life as something else
anyway, it’s complex and i think it’s easy to turn it into a sexuality thing and while my sexuality is a thing i feel like i chose for myself it’s also significantly a political thing and one that doesn’t actually require any kind of choice in sexuality at all, just a choice in who you give your energy and love and attention to and who you consider important. as lesbians we’re encouraged to see men as important, and the more gay we are the more important it is that we have a place for men and manhood in our lives. that, for us, is what political lesbianism is a response to
- being small and weak
these are universal features of being cis but experiencing them does not make you cis or mean that cisness is right for you… get educated
im pretty sure my ex still occasionally looks at my blog and gets all pissed off so. hey whenever you read this: go to church
*covers my girlfriend with a blanket and puts up a sign in front that says “she is just a bi baby”*
if someone approached me for romantic or sexual entanglements and said that they were interested in me because they like cis men, amab nonbinaries and trans women i would be furious, not to mention terrified of what this person thought of my body and what they wanted to do with it
okay the camera didnt load in time before it drove away so just imagine this post is a picture of a cop car captioned with “kill” or “die,” whichever is funnier
we’re at a restaurant waiting for our dinner and these boys just start using water to draw a racist stereotype of an asian on the table with no prompting whatsoever